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I suppose the hum-drum of getting out hundreds of dollars each day would get a little boring after awhile but here's a news flash K-Fed........panhandling on a street corner one year from now will not make you yawn.
When Fox News refers to you as Angelina's boy toy I think it's safe to say you're whipped. Congrats to Brad for being a Fad Dad. Yeah....um how the hell do you think she found out.........she saw all the pictures from the last couple of months like the rest of us did.
Paris Hilton took a piss in a taxicab while vacationing in Hawaii. Miss Hilton was apparently too drunk to realize that she had peed all over the backseat of the cab and never apologized to the cabbie. The cab driver says that he cleaned up the mess with a towel and plans to use Hilton's own DNA as evidence against her. Hilton denies any wrong doing. Right..... because if you're Paris Hilton it's totally kosher to use a taxi cab as a bathroom. Taxicabs smell like dirty bathrooms so what's the difference right? This could be an episode on Law and Order:Criminal Intent- The socialite defecation mystery. I think Tinkerbell and the entourage of six pound dogs had a little fun with the yellow dress. Picture via Dlisted hotness.
Paris and her friends use a secret code when they want to help each other escape from talking to people who aren't cool. The party-girl says, "My friends and I have code words and phrases that we use when we need help. If I say to them, 'Tiffany is crying!' then they know to jump in. Hmm...I think I know a code that people use when they don't want to talk to you too Paris and it includes a big fat middle finger. Just your average day at the massage parlor.
Oh well.....better late than fucking never. Here goes disasters................... It's nice that a munchkin from the Wizard of Oz could attend. Yeah...were surprised you're here too. Mariah couldn't fit into her dress so with the magic of a little scissor work the night is saved. Was your dog mad that you borrowed his collar? I guess when you haven't had a hit in a couple of years you can only afford half-a-dress. Unfortunately Pam's boobs had to be wrapped up in a sling due to a slight sprain .
Geri Halliwell of Spice Girls fame, is consulting Victoria Beckham for pregnancy and parenting advice.Yeah that's like consulting Nicole Richie for for dieting tips. Not your best choice Ginger Spice. Chaps again Posh? Did you watch Brokeback Mountain and get inspired or something? Picture yanked off of Popsugar
Courtney Love is not impressed with Lindsay Lohan's Vanity Fair cover. Love doesn't understand why Lohan would be put on the cover of the magazine for admitting drug use when Love herself, has admitted drug use yet hasn't appeared on any covers. In the land of "smart" and "not so much", Courtney Love clearly wins the second choice. Seeing Courtney Love on a magazine cover would clearly give me a case of the bulimias. Last I checked you had to weigh about 90 pounds to be on a magazine cover and that means your entire body.... not just your head. I have two asthma inhalers in my purse.
If you need to hire a babysitter, then consider Kevin Federline your man. The Fed claims he is quite the Dad because he's a diaper changing machine. "I've got it down to a science," Federline, 27, tells TV's Access Hollywood. "I can do it with one hand tied behind my back with the phone on my ear." Damn Kevin Federline makes Mary Poppins look like a child endangerer. Forget rapping, K-Fed should devote his life to opening his own daycare. He can call it Playerz and Pacifiers. That's one nasty hooker that Kevin managed to pick up.
Wow the financial effects of a divorce are totally getting to Jessica. Enough money this month for Botox but not enough in the piggy bank to get your roots done.
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