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Pamela Anderson is denying reports of marriage rumors surrounding her and ex-husband, Tommy Lee. Anderson states that the two are close but a third walk down the aisle will not happen.You mean you don't like the spousal assaults and STD infections from Tommy? But this time you can't beat me up Tommy. I'm not paying for you legal shit again.
Paris Hilton and her Greek shipping heir fiance', Paris Latsis, are not on speaking terms. The two fought while on vacation in Greece and Hilton has since flown back to the U.S. Latsis' family is secretly thrilled because they are not fond of Hilton. Not to worry, she will find a new fiance' in no time. We hear Tommy Lee is available. Forget my first sex tape. This one is going to be so much better!
Hilary Duff and Joel Madden from the band Good Charlotte, are official. Duff is very happy and vows to try to keep their relationship private. Keep it private like your dentist who did your horrible veneers. Hilary and her teeth make a guest appearance
Courtney Love is pissed because her beloved daughter, Frances Bean, was not invited to Steven Spielberg's sons bar mitzvah. The two are apparently good friends and participate in equestrian events together. Bar mitzvahs aren't exactly known for booze and drugs Courtney, so I don't think you missed anything. Moommm......Stop embarrassing me!
Michael Jackson is thinking of moving to Europe. Jackson is no longer happy in America and feels he could rebuild the Neverland Ranch in Germany. That's just his fancy way of saying he's done with all the little boys here and wants to check out the fresh European meat. Willy Wonka and the little boy factory.
Angelina Jolie's new baby Zahara, has just been released from the hospital. Zahara was adopted from an Ethiopian orphanage and had fallen ill shortly after she left the country. It should be no time at all until Brad Pitt is teaching her how to ride a bike. Maddox's 15 minutes is so over.
Jessica Simpson is nervously awaiting the release of her first movie "Dukes of Hazard". Simpson is scared of possible criticism because people will view her as a singer and not as an actress. Don't worry Jess, we just view you as a slut. Girls, sell the pics now cuz they won't be worth shit in five years.
The world renowned blog "THE BOSH" posted some fun facts about our friend Ms.Richie. Nicole would love to screw Kobe Bryant, has six pet rats, and got arrested for heroin possession.No wonder so many teens think Nicole is their role-model. Here take the cash and buy yourself a Frappuccino
Madonna has reinvented herself as a proper English lady. She reveals that she used to be a very selfish person and now feels that she has finally grown up. No Madonna...your just boring now. The Bloods and the Crips
Jack Osbourne is skinny. He has been losing weight by running and eating healthy. Are you sure your not on the ritalin and cocaine diet? It's pretty popular right now. Jack runs to the drug dealers house
Jude Law's fiance' Sienna Miller is no longer wearing her engagement ring. This is because Jude put on his beer googles one night and banged the nanny. Hope it was worth it Alfie. Are Pink Uggs back in fashion?
Ryan Seacrest is getting his own fashion line because he loves to design clothes. And Michael Jackson gets to teach Kindergarten because he likes little boys. And I'm getting a pony because I like horses...blah blah blah. I got my own fashion line Mom......and all I got for it was this cool shirt.
Ahhh.......dirty Colin Farrell is suing his ex-girlfriend in an effort to stop her from releasing a sex tape. Farrell is stating that a release of this tape could ruin his career. Would this ruin your career because the Goods aren't that big? I want YOU to be in my next sex video
Teri Hatcher claims that she is quitting Desperate Housewives after next season to pursue her movie career. I've got two words for you Teri- David Caruso. It only took him ten years to find another hit TV series after his movie career tanked. You make enough money now, so go splurge on a breast lift.